Mst 10

Todays episode starts with lemmy quietly walking threw a library of shelfs and books, he keeps his pace as he centers his colorful fez on his forhead.
Lemmy: Greetings, Welcome to Lemmy's land fun fiction archive. Here we have a nearly endless supply of Karma koopa rip offs... er I mean Blatent self insertion, fun and exitement.
Lemmy stracths the side of his scaled head as he remains silent awkwardly for several seconds.
Lemmy: Hrm, Well... In any case theres alot of it... Some of its good.... Yeah. Pretty sure its readable too. I have my doubts though.
he then removes a book from one of the shelfs and examines it.
Lemmy: Here's a good example.... Wait this is by Mewd.
Lemmy quickly drops it and backs away from it with a feared look in his eyes.
Lemmy: As you know, no Fun website could be complete without bad stories along with the good. We make sure to keep a good level of bad ones to even things out. The truely best ones are as well hidden and sacred as easter eggs.
He turns about and heads back down the row of shelves, and points as a shelf containing stories by Smash, TMS, Karma, and others. However the shelf has a moat of acid about it with sentre droids and a large number of explosives about it.
Lemmy: Keeping things fair around here is a tough job, I hope your thankful for all the work I've put into this website. Otherwise I'll blame you for all my proplems and mope about with a distinct dislikeing of the human species.
Lemmy walks further down the line of shelfs, by passing the sentret droid and explosives with a click of a car alarm switch disarming them.
*ent ent*
Lemmy: Don't get me wrong, We here at lemmy's land appreciate all the stories sent in.... Don't we?
Lemmy stands silently for a minute, then as a random underling passes by and whispers into Lemmys ear, he nods and the underling retreats.
Lemmy: Uh-Of course we do! yeah... Thats right...
Lemmy: Anyways I'd like to take this moment, to thank each and every auther besides LKT, and Mewd, for all the wonderful work they have made and contribuated to my website. Without you this place would just be a blatent ego shrine! An-Wait... thats not such a bad idea....
Lemmy cuffs his hand around his chin in thought.
He then staggers back awake from his fantasy imedietly.
Lemmy: In anycase I hope your all proud of the fact I am useing some of the worser stories to help me in a evil plot to numb the minds of all of humanity so they'll be too stupid to fight back during a world conquest scheme... once I think of one Escued Pinky and the Brain. Anyway theres the long awaited back story, enjoy it becuase we're going to probbally ignore it later on and just make fun of stories for no reason.
He happily pulls out a check list from somewhere.
Lemmy: Thank authers, check, Make up senseless back story, check, Make fun of LKT and Mewd, check, Remove pastry from toaster and enjoy, check, Send Mewd yet another story to MST....
Lemmy then walks up to a laptop computer that mysteriosly appears on a empty shelf, he then places a webcam atop it and logs in.

Mewd: Cue theme song!

In the far far off future,
sometime yesterday,
There was a idiot cat guy named Mewd,
Alot weirder then you or me,
He had a job at Lemmys land compileing stories,
And he really did a horrible job at it,
But Lemmy didn't like him so he shot him into space!
He'll send him cheesy fan fics,
The worst he can find la la la,
he'll have to sit and read them all,
While they monitar his mind la la la,
Now try to remember, that no one controls when the stories begin or end, la la la,
Becuse he used the parts of the machine, to teleport his Aim freinds!
Current MSTing Aim freinds roll coll!

Mewd!
("I'm the moron")

Smash Damacon!
("Fear me!")

if you are wondering how they eat and breath, and other science facts, la la la,
just remind your self its just a MSTing you should really just relax...

Its Lemmys land science theater, 3000!

Now we take you to the koopa satelite of pain,

a destinctfull large koopa troopa shell shaped satelite floats by the screen slowly with plit in the background.

Smash Damacon: See anything yet?
Mewd: I see a stupid looking person
Smash Damacon: Okay.
Smash bends over and twists a knob on the control pannel, The hose Mewd is holding begins to spray him with water.
Minutes pass, Mewd hasn't reacted in anyway as he has yet to remove the hose from his face, apparently he is drown. Or drinking all of it.... Or takeing a long needed bath.
The large moniter that takes up a good portion of the room flashes on as Lemmy's fez crowned head appears in front of both of them.
Lemmy: Morons!
Mewd drops the hose imedietly,
Mewd: Yes?
Lemmy: Seeing as my plan for world domination thingie has just been explained I need to force you to read another story so I feel like I haven't wasted my time makeing the story seem less realistic.
Smash Damacon: Of course, I'll be leaveing now.
Lemmy: I'm afraid not, seeing as your currently visiting you'll have to go with him. Now get in there before I blow up the satelite killing both of you gratudusly.
Smash groans tiredly along with Mewd as he smashes the keyboard, and they roll threw a series of hospital hall ways atop a hospital bed.
Smash Damacon: I'm gonna die....

Super Bowser Bros., Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7 By Koopa T. Quick

Mewd: Seeing as there are only six parts to this story I am left wondering if lemmy miscounted. Mewd's chair begins to shoot sparks and he shakes violently screaming in pain.

Bowser waited in his castle, trying to decide when to attack Mario.

Smash Damacon: Easy, whenever Nintendo comes out with its next rip off game

At about 7:00, a man wandered in!

Mewd: he just sort of walked past all the guards and traps set up and asked where the bathroom was.

Bowser thought it was Mario, but no,

Smash Damacon: It was another random guy in red. Mewd: Instead it was just a blind, crippled, deaf and small old lady on a motorized shopping cart. makeing him rethink his security budget

Instead, it hung up pictures of Mario and Luigi around the castle.

Smash Damacon: Why, the world will never know. Mewd: He's hanging up wanted posters in the place Mario and Luigi would most likely be around. Smash Damacon: But why would he do that? All Bowser's troops already know about them. Mewd: Well he thinks they'll forget.

It also used a "good maker" to make some of Bowser's minions (namely all the Hammer Brother types) good.

Mewd: Good maker...? Smash Damacon: Good maker. Both Shrug while shakeing there heads. Mewd: Well I suppose it makes sense... in a LKT escue sorta way. probbally a plot devise from the orignal Mario show. Smash Damacon: Could be.

Bowser watched where it went and saw it headed to Nimbus Land.

Mewd: So all of his minions who changed side lined up in a long row, that led straight to nimbus land. Smash Damacon: Yep. You should have been there. Smash Damacon: It was so stupid it was hilarious.

Bowser jumped up from his throne and roared, "WHO IS DOING THIS?! I WANT HIM!" and went off.

Mewd: well seeing as the "guy" never left the room while zapping minions he kinda lost track of him. Smash Damacon: So he waited until now to leap up and do anything? Smash Damacon: One would think that he would have attacked when the idiot walked in the room. Mewd: Well the whole minion changeing thing wasn't exactly enough to trigger a reaction Smash Damacon: Why not? Mewd: Becuase they weren't all standing in a line. Smash Damacon: What would that mean? Mewd: that all the stupidness would of been powered directly at him threw the chain of beings and caused him to realize what was going on

Before he left, he got Morton Koopa (not Jr.) and took him along.

Mewd: So he could make stupid senior citizen jokes on his trip. Smash Damacon: Not that he hasn't already, of course.

Land One: Mushroom Kingdom

Mewd: Now their going to list the lands in the order they visit them for some reason. Smash Damacon Sighs in desperation. Mewd: I'd be lost without this kind of organization Smash Damacon: Says you Smash Damacon: Get me outta here!

Morton: Why are we coming here? We can go straight to Nimbus Land.

Mewd: Morton Why are we going to a place we're already at? Smash Damacon: Bowser: Because I feel like it.

Bowser: THEY BROKE THE BRIDGE! WE HAVE TO GO THROUGH!

Mewd: Bowser: Now all we have to do is get across the huge gapping casem that seperates the mushroom kingdom and our keep! Smash Damacon: But there is no bridge between Nimbus Land and Bowser's Keep! Mewd: True, though they probbally forgot about all those flying minions and devises they own as well. Smash Damacon: It's just too convienent.

Morton: Oh. Well, at least let's cause some Koopa MAYHEM to the people! Bowser: All right!

Mewd: I feel like this is the teen bowser and his drunken senile hippie father for some reason. Smash Damacon: Maybe it is

Bowser hit some mushroom people and some good minions.

Mewd: (cheerfully) who didn't react in any way! Smash Damacon: He hit them with a deck of cards. Smash Damacon: And then lost all his cash.

They decided to go teach Mario a lesson, too.

Mewd: So instead of going to the source of their proplem they'll waste time by picking on their mortal enenmy? how I do feel I'm spending my time reading something so well deserving of it. Smash Damacon: The inherent stupidity so well relates to you.

They hit Mario and stole some spaghetti koopons (not coupons, koopons!).

Mewd: Thank you so very much for makeing sure we get your spelling error. Smash Damacon: But why? Smash Damacon: Why would they want pasta?

Mario protested, but they left laughing.

Smash Damacon: Sure, and Mario wouldn't attack them? Smash Damacon: For that matter, if they did beat him, why didn't they try to conquer the kingdom as well? Smash Damacon: I sense a great lack of fighting instinct in this story. Mewd: Mario: hey you took my value saveings koopons, give them back please. Smash Damacon: Bowser: Hahahahahahahaha. Mewd: Morton: we laugh at your polite question!

They almost got through to the Kero Sewers, but a Hammer Brother stopped them!

Smash Damacon: How? They're both bigger than a measly Hammer Brother. They could just squish it into a big organic pancake and continue on their brain cell-slaying route. Mewd: Well it asked them to ansewer a riddle before they could pass, cuaseing them to be left in a stunned manner over mind baffleing questions like. "why do hot dogs come in packages of eight when buns come in packages of six?"

Hammer Brother: You can't pass! You will not defeat our leader!

Mewd: hammer brother: Who's you, I won't let you harm yourself! Smash Damacon: Bowser was reduced to wimpering and cowering in his shell from such a bold threat.

A terrific battle raged, but Bowser and Morton won eventually.

Mewd: it took hours but they finally managed to defeat whoever they were fighting. Now lets deal with the hammer brother. Smash Damacon: You know what's really bugging me about this story? Mewd: what? Smash Damacon: Well, you know that Morton is Bowser's father, right? Mewd: right, Smash Damacon: And that means that he was once king of the Koopa Empire, right? Mewd: right, Smash Damacon: Well, I have it from very good sources that Bowser assassinated the former king before seizing power. Smash Damacon: So he's walking around with a dead and decaying corpse. Smash Damacon: Does that sound right to you? Mewd: whos to say they didn't skip a genaration to avoid a drunken senile rulership? Mewd: Wait thats not very accurate, they'd have to skip two genarations. Smash Damacon: Lemmy and Bowser. Smash Damacon: And Morton, when he was alive. Smash Damacon: And the Koopa library. Smash Damacon: And all records I've seen. Mewd: Well sue me for trying to make a historically incorrect statement as well as this story can. Smash Damacon: Okay, I'll see you and this story in court. Smash Damacon: After we get out of this stupid sattelite,

Hammer Brother: You... can't... win...Morton: We can and will! The two go on.

Mewd: Great, now the hammer brothers helping the cast and narrater remember their lines. Smash Damacon: How dreadful -Reverse door seaqunce The two of them exit onto the main room the the satelite, at this point you'd think this was the ONLY room. Smash Damacon: Wait, the stories not over... Oh no, we're not going to start doing.... Mewd: That's right, Host segments! Smash groans annoyedly. Smash damacon: Why?! Dear lord why?! Mewd: Becuase its been done before, and to keep in spirit with lemmy's land fun fiction section of copying bad jokes. Smash Damacon: Fine. What do we do we do with these blasted things that only prolong this waste of time? Mewd: Today we'll be doing Letters, We'll take questions and death threats sent into us by readers. Seeing as theres no mail service in space yet we'll just make due with this handful of letters I somehow got a hold of. He then propells three letters in his hand and happily rips a hole in the first one, and after ten minutes of trying to get it out he gets the battered letter out. Dear Mewd and the evil Smash damacon, I am a repeatid reader of the MSTings you've written. And I have on a random whim deicded to ask you why, If you have the ability to teleport people to the satelite did you never think of useing the power to go back to plit? Signed Smash Damacon Mewd fumbles the letter behind his back and grins broadly. Mewd: To tell you the truth when I disasembled the machine that was used to control when the stories begin and pause and such I wasn't able to make it teleport people back... If your wondering where all the other msting authers are... He then staggers to a closest at the side of the room, and upon opening it a unconish Golden road, TMS, Sandslash, Black belt, Smash sumashi and Jon fall out onto the floor. Mewd: that should explain it. Here, you ansewer the next one Smash. Smash shakes his head and rips the top of the letter off easily with a claw, and pulls the letter out. Dear Mewd, lately have you realized that you have been makeing fun of how people blatently self insert themselfs into their stories and ususally ignore the main characters of the game. Though this is all well and good you do realize that your doing this yourself by adding your own character to MSTings don't you? I hope your happy you ignorant ignoramus idiot. signed, Mewd </> Mewd: Argh! Its true! I've befallen my mockings! I'm filth! Smash Damacon: thats all well and good but lets get this over with before you bore me to death. Mewd opens the next letter exitedly, and accidently shreads it into four peices, he reasembles them terribly with duct tape and then proceeds to read it. Dear whoever you are, why did you add more narration to the story?! Its cuaseing me more work! I hate you! Signed, the narrater Mewd: uh... He looks confused while in deep thought, and stupid, and such. Mewd: Okay, the narrater jokes gone far enough, its been done to death. Sorry. Mewd: Okay, thats about it, lets go back now. -Door seaqunce.

Land 2: Kero Sewers and Yoster' Isle

Mewd: skipping everywhere inbetween.

Morton: Are we gonna cause some more Koopa MAYHEM?

Mewd: and waste time with unimportant side events that draw the story out longer while leaveing no describtians for the important events? Smash Damacon: Blahh....

Morton: Are we gonna cause some more Koopa MAYHEM?

Mewd: and waste time with unimportant side events that draw the story out longer while leaveing no describtians for the important events? Smash Damacon: Bowser: Nah, I want to go to the movies instead.

Bowser: But of course, Morton!

Smash Damacon: Just remove the t. Smash Damacon: Then you'll get a description of the story. Smash Damacon: And the writer Smash Damacon: And the characters.

The two of them scratched some good minions and mushrooms at the sewers. After a while they ran into Belome!

Mewd: I have a feeling this basicly sums up every chapter of the story Smash Damacon: Except without the three words of description that this one had

Belome: Hungry, hungry, HUNGRY!

Mewd: More well thought out diologe! Smash Damacon: Among other things. *Gag* Mewd: Belome: Wait I meant "angry, angry, ANGREY" as my reaction to appearing in this story.

Belome licked Bowser, but Bowser scratched him.

Mewd: *intese* *battle* *action* Well atleast it were if you considered sibling rivalre escue fighting intense. Smash Damacon: But where did Bowser scratch him? Smash Damacon: We need much more description.

Morton: That'll teach you to mess with... Bowser: The SUPER BOWSER BROTHERS!

Smash Damacon: But they're not brothers! Smash Damacon: And one's dead! Mewd: seeing as morton dosen't have the word bowser anywhere in his name he might be carrying a mirror. Smash Damacon: True...true...

Belome ate Morton. Belome: YUMMY YUMMY DOWN MY TUMMY!

Mewd: Apparently belomes been walking around speaking for morton all this time as he's already been eaten. Smash Damacon: Huh? Mewd6: The story is stateing that belomes ate morton, a past tense. We're either hours after he swollowed him or he's been speaking for him this whole time.

Bowser scratched him. Belome spit out Morton and ran away. Bowser and Morton headed to Rose Town.

Smash Damacon: Where they died from getting poked by thorns. Mewd: I'm surrprize the battle hadn't lasted long enough for wedgies and wet willies. Smash Damacon: ....ewwww.... Smash imedietly Shoves Mewd into his popcorn bucket.

Morton: Goody! It's time for more Koopa MAYHEM!

Mewd: *tiredly* Mayhem...! Smash Damacon: *gag*

Bowser: That's what you get for messing with the-

Smash Damacon and Mewd In complete unison with the story...sorta: STUPID BOWSER BROTHERS! Smash Damacon: Thank Takhisis that this joke is never repeated again.

SUPER BOWSER BROTHERS! They headed to Yoster' Isle.

Mewd: Mainly becuase its completely out of the way and unimportant. Smash Damacon: And that it would just let the writer do more stupid battle schemes.

Morton: Remember when you were a kid?

Mewd: Back when you were horribly traumatized when I dropped you on your head repeatidly on purpose? Smash Damacon: Bowser: Uhhhh... no. I was in a drug-induced coma all that time, if you remember.

Bowser jumped on a Yoshi. Morton jumped on another. They laughed, but a blue Yoshi kicked them!

Smash Damacon: So the blue Yoshi kicked another Yoshi? Mewd6: Well we can't be sure, it dosen't speffific who laughed. so for all we know Mario and luigi's been kicked while laughing. Smash Damacon: I know, but the Yoshis were the last male (I assume) noun, so I must assume that they are who is meant.

Bowser scratched Boshi. Boshi scratched Bowser. Morton and Bowser did a double-scratch.

Mewd: then he screamed. He screamed loudly. while clutching. his. chest. in. pain. then he. spoke. "Ow". "that hurt". Smash Damacon: Not again.... Smash Hides in his popcorn for the rest of the battle scene. Smash Damacon: In case you're wondering, I got a large. I would have gotten a Jumbo, but it wouldn't have fit in the theatre

Boshi: OUCH!

Mewd: The single most inspired peice of diologe ever Smash Damacon: Go on Mewd6: Boshi ran away. Bowser and Morton laughed. Smash Damacon: *Pokes his head out of the popcorn* It it over yet? Mewd: Almost, we still have to listen to their gratuidus victory speach. Smash Damacon: Okay, I'm listening Smash Damacon: Bowser: Blah. blah. blah. I am great. Blah. Smash Damacon Crawls out of his popcorn container.

Land 3: Moleville and the Booster Residence

Mewd: apparently civelians count as a land mass. Smash Damacon: Apparently Booster's been downsizing.

Morton: We're in Moleville, Bowser!

Mewd: Don't ask how or why, we just are. Smash Damacon: How? Why?

It's time to cause some more Koopa MAYHEM!

Mewd: *groaning tiredly* Mayhem.... Smash Damacon: I can't take it anymore! Smash Begins tearing apart the theatre and we end up in an escape pod yet again. Smash Damacon: Sorry.... Mewd: we need to try and downsize the miniture theater budget. Smash Damacon: Okay. Smash casually Tears out all the chairs But two. Smash Damacon: There, I cut the matience costs.

Bowser scratched a mole.

Mewd: We Reallllllly needed to know that, now what about the actully village? Smash Damacon: *Imitateing the writer* Bowser scratched a mole. The mole died. Bowser laughed. The End.

He threatened that he'd kill it if it didn't tell everything it knew about a shadow creature.

Smash Damacon: Mole: Let's see... it's made of shadows...I can't see any features...and it's black. Mewd: Bowser: tell me about something that will be of no help that I haven't heard of or known of up until this point.

Mole: OK, it's like this! I won't tell you in a million... OK! He comes to Koopa Castle every Friday the Thirteenth, turns some minions good, and takes off.

Mewd: Mole: things like this ussually aren't noticed very ofetin, thats why only I know. Smash Damacon: I think I could comprehend a semi-good plot element that the writer was too stupid to notice.

Bowser: Now all you hafta tell me is where this shadowy guy lives and you're free.

Smash Damacon: But how would the mole know where a shadow guy he's never seen lives?

Mole: Nimbus Castle, Nimbus Land.

Mewd: how come a random commoner knows more then a evil dictater? Smash Damacon: It's an MST. Things don't have to make sense.

The mole left.

Mewd: bowser's death grip isn't very effective to hold hostages still. Smash Damacon: Yes, an evil dictator would let a hostage go when he didn't have to. Smash Damacon: If it was voluntary.

Morton and Bowser headed to Seaside Town. On the way, though, a weird train guy named Booster stopped them!

Smash Damacon: *sigh* Again.... Smash Damacon: Does this escape pod have an escape pod so I can tear apart this theatre? Mewd hastilly buckles a seat belt that somehow appears in his seat and puts on a helmet. Mewd: get ready for another "intense" battle.

Booster: YOU'RE DEAD, DEAD, DEAD!

Mewd's chair slowly moves forward at a slugish pace as he grins widely with a tense look in his eyes. Smash Damacon: Morton: Too late. I'm already dead. Smash Damacon: *Looks at Mewd* What are you doing? Mewd: I'm rideing the "intense" battle action by powering my motorized chair with the story.

Morton: Not if we have anything to do with it! Bowser, get out the DRILL CLAW!

Smash Damacon: Then Bowser dropped the DRILL CLAW down a HUGE CRACK in the GROUND where it DRILLED to the CENTER of the EARTH and caused an EARTHQUAKE, destroying the ENTIRE WORLD! Mewd: they don't have much to do with their own deaths, so they didn't worry.

Bowser did so and scratched Booster.

Mewd's chair continues to stroll almost at a unmoveing pace forward as his face remains unmoved. Smash Dives into his popcorn again as the battle starts, his head pops out of the top of it and sprays caffiene gas at Mewd in a attempt to wake him.

Bowser: Tell us how to get to Nimbus Land and you're free.

Smash Damacon: Bowser: I don't have to pay anything to kill you.

Booster (whose neck was grabbed by Morton): Okay! Just go to Seaside Town through Star Hill, climb up Bean Valley and walk to the castle. You can't miss it!

Mewd: just walk upward at a 90 degree angle.

Bowser: Okay. Thanks! Bowser and Morton head to Marrymore where the entrance to Star Hill is. They scratch mushrooms and cake until they tell them everything they know about the defenses of Nimbus Land.

Mewd: they didn't ask for that either, they just told them to blunder their minds with confuseion enough to give them a wedgie.

Mushroom: They have plenty of guards. They sing this "Yoh, Eee, Ooh" song all the time.

Smash Damacon: Sound like pirates. Mewd: Actully its a inobvios injoke, though he makes it sound more like a yodel then a chant

Morton: Sounds like guards to me! Do they have weaknesses? Mushroom: They can't stand being scratched.

Mewd: *groans* I didn't see that comeing. Smash Damacon: *Groans* Why me? What did I ever do to deserve this? Mewd: Trying to dominate the world and force your every whim to be carried out by all lower then you? Smash Damacon: Well, I mean aside from that. Mewd: Asking for extra butter on your popcorn? Smash Damacon: Nah

Morton: We'll remember that. Thank you.

Smash Damacon: Morton: Thank you for not letting me kill you.

Mushroom: Anything to keep me alive!

Mewd: Now teach me about that breathing thing again. Smash Damacon Begins to tremble slightly

Land 4: Star Hill, Seaside Town, Sunken Ship

Mewd: koo...pa...may...hem... *groans* Smash Damacon: *Notices something* Smash Damacon: They didn't say it! Smash and Mewd laugh in complete and utter joy as they dance around the room.

Bowser and Morton headed to Star Hill. Bowser noticed a bandit, but he didn't care.

Mewd: Huzzah, a battle seaqunce has been avoided! Smash Pulls out all the party supplies out from behind his back. Smash Damacon: Celebrate! He Sprays Mewd with pop.

He just wanted to kill that one weirdo who had turned his enemies good.

Mewd: bowser: I -hate- it when people make my hated foes join my side. Smash Is still laughing too much to care.

The bandit stole Morton's money, though. THAT got their attention!

Mewd: Aw, the little theif only wanted to be noticed. Smash Damacon: But what was THAT? Was THAT something attention-getting? Was it worth getting attention?'

Bowser: DIE!

Mewd: *taps smash on the sholder* The writer deicded to make another action seaqunce. Smash Damacon: *Jaw drops in shere shock* NOOOOO! *Screams and falls with a resounding thump!* I'm dead... *Lays twitching on the floor*

The Koopas scratched the bandit together. He fell down, mumbling "Mr. Marsh..."

Smash Damacon: *Twitch, twitch* Mewd prods smash with a stick Smash Damacon: *Twitch, twitch*

Bowser: Sounds like he was gonna say "Marshmallow!"

Mewd: well he managed to ruin the dramatic moment by makeing a stupid comment before we could here his last words. so lets all clap for bowser. Smash Damacon: *Tounge rolls out of his mouth and onto the floor as he twitches again. Mewd: I'm happy to see you in a similer spirit. Smash Damacon: *Twitch*

The Koopas headed to Seaside town where Yaridovich and his Goomba/Koopa warriors were waiting.

Smash Damacon: *Acidic blood begins to come out of his mouth* Mewd: I would normally be worried about your health if it hadn't been for all the fun there is for stick pokeing Mewd waves a photograph of gillian above Damacons head. Smash Damacon: *One eyelid flutters, but nothing more. Goes limp* He then force feeds you a very fragrunt chunk of rabite steak. Smash Drools, one eye lit flutters opens as he bites Mewd's entire extended arm. Mewd: ahhh *pulls arm away* he staggers up and shakes his head wearilly. Smash Damacon: Am I in Heaven? Mewd: the fics still playing Mewd: so its the other place. Smash Damacon: NOOOO!

The Koopas headed to Seaside town where Yaridovich and his Goomba/Koopa warriors were waiting.

Mewd: Only in this fic could someone desemble and reasemble with another like a lego bricks. Smash Damacon: Is it not terrible?

Bowser: YARIDOVICH! What have you done?! What are those Goomba/Koopas?!

Mewd: And why aren't you dead? Smash Damacon: And why aren't you doing TV commercials?

Yaridovich: They're Goopas- enemies made from Goombas and Koopas!

Mewd: so yaridovich made some mutants for bowser? Smash Damacon: They're very unstable and will self destruct whenever they touch anything other than air or the ground. Mewd: *explosian* wait, never mind about the ground thing. Smash Damacon: Oops, oh well.

Morton scratched Yaridovich. Yaridovich had the Goopas attack with powerful shell throws- the Goopas took off their shells and threw them at the enemies.

Mewd: Then they. ran away. when. realizeing. they were now. completely. naked. Smash Damacon: Then we. All died. After we. Discovered. That we. Could never. Escape.

The Para-Goopas used Wing Attack.

Mewd: greaaat, now we have a pokemon referance, I feel woozy. Smash begins to Gag on his own fire and it comes out the wrong end. Mewd: They attacked themselves by slapping their wings accross their faces. As they had no dirrect order as to who they were to attack. Smash Damacon: *Gag, hack, choke* Smash Finally gets straightened out and attacks the screen with anger.

Piranha Plants ate up Bowser and Morton.

Mewd: Seeing as they weren't there two seconds ago they'll probbally just disappear without any explanation once they scratch the goopa's. Smash Damacon: You know this writer too well. -Reverse door seaqunce Out in space we watch the koopa troopa shell maraculassy catches the escape pod in mid fall. Mewd: Ah man, I woulda of liked to escape, Then I could go back to makeing horrible disgruntled and stories worthy of being msted. Smash damacon pauses as his eyes widen before responding. Smash damacon: Wait, If this thing has escape pods, that means as long as we don't get caught in a tractor beam we could get back to plit! Mewd: Wha... Why didn't I think of that? Smash damacon: the ansewers a little to obvios to point out. Mewd imedietly goes to the controll pannel and turns off the tracter beam. Mewd: there, now the ship won't use the gravitational pull of the esacape pod to catch us. Smash Damacon:....What? Never mind, I don't want to try and make sense of your babble. Smash Damacon: Maybe making fun of a bad story will get your mind off things. Mewd: The best way to do that is to mock someone blantently Smash Damacon: *Cowers in horror of what he's going to have to read* They return to the escape pod. -door seaqunce

Bowser and Morton did a double scratch but it didn't defeat them! Yaridovich combined Piranha Plants and Bullet Bills to create Piranha Bills- biting projectiles!

Smash Damacon: Well, two scratches are hardly enough to beat a guy made out of metal. It's more likely that Bowser's claws would have broken off. Mewd: Lets see, he took a potted carnivorus plant and a liveing bullet and somehow blended their genes and body into one being. I'm guessing that this guy has had to much time learning about how microwaves work. Smash Damacon: Among other things.

They charged at Bowser and Morton, knocking them down. Morton used a KeroKeroKola to revive them.

Smash Damacon: And where did they get this Kerowhatsis thingy? Mewd6: He just pulled it from behind his back magically. Smash Damacon: How'd he learn how to do that? Mewd: Rotting corspes know many things evil one. Smash Damacon: *sarcasticly* Bwahahahaha. Mewd6: in any case since neither of them had been killed and kerokola's don't revive people it wasn't much help.

They charged at the Yaridovich dude. He gave up.

Smash Damacon: Yes, just seeing a decaying corpse and a guy less than one third your height run at you is so intimidating that you must give up instantly.

Bowser finished him off by stepping on him.

Mewd: no very merciful are they? He never attacked them either. the mutants did. Smash Damacon: My question is how could Bowser step on him if Yarid is at least three times as tall as Bowser. Mewd: He bent over and helped him get on his back, where as he just carried him around for a while.

Yaridovich: Mr. Nimbus King... </fontsize>

Smash Damacon: He had been breathing helium.

Bowser and Morton headed on out of Seaside Town. The journey went on...

Mewd: while they completley ignored another dieing persons final words before they are gripped by the cold hand of death. Smash Damacon: and on and on and on until the pathetic fools reading it die from brain decompisition.

Land 5: Land's End and Bean Valley

Mewd: did you notice that they had put sunken ship in the title of the last chapter and yet they entire skipped past it? makes me wish the entire story went like that.

Morton and Bowser walked across Land's End.

Mewd: right off the end of the land, falling over the end of the world. Huzzah! Smash Damacon: Unfortunetly, they fell into one of the many cannons and were blasted back into the movie, causing both of us to have a stroke and a heart attack simoultainously.

Since they knew the people at Monstro Town were good, they skipped the town.

Mewd: they just jumped over it somehow. they know that it've been impossible for the town closest to where nimbus land was would of been invulnerable to the magical good maker dealie. Smash Damacon: Thank the gods! No 'mayhem!' *Sighs deeply in relief*

While at the cliff, they saw Drill Bit.

Smash Damacon: He was a gear.

Drill Bit: Sir King asked me to keep you from getting to Nimbus Land!

Mewd: Bowser phoned ahead so that drill bit would have to fight him so the writer could squeeze in another stupid fight scene. Smash Damacon: I didn't know Stephen King had been knighted.

Bowser: Hey, Morton! 'Sir King' must be the guy who turned all my army good!

Smash Damacon: I don't get the interchangement of good and evil in this story. Smash Damacon: Bowser's considered 'evil,' but he phrases all of his enemies 'evil' as well. And these 'good' people are all innocent civillians. Mewd: Wait that grammers wrong, its more like this, Mewd: Bowser: he somehow cuased my entire army to circle about rather well.

Morton: This will help us! Thank you, Drill Idiot!

Smash Damacon: Yes, 'Bit' and 'Idiot' sound so much alike that Morton's corpse easily confused the two. Mewd: He's insulting the small cute screw shaped robot for giveing them valuable knowalge. KILL HIM!

Drill Bit: HEY, watch your mouth or get destroyed, okay, "Morton T. Moron!?"

Smash Damacon: No argument here Mewd: Ahh, small screw shaped robots gonna kill us all! Mewd cowars in fear. Smash Damacon: No need to cower yet. It's at least 5 seconds until the next fight scene

Morton and Bowser scratched "Drill Idiot" and went on their way.

Mewd: Well it lasted 5 seconds atleast. Smash Damacon: The drill guy had to run and get a Band-Aid.

The arrow followed them and jumped in their path though!

Smash Damacon: Drill Bit ain't an arrow. Mewd: Who said it was drill bit, It could be a high way sign with a arrow on it that meracullasy came to life and deicded to pick a fight? Smash Damacon: Possibly. Mewd: I wouldn't doubt it with the current story line. Smash Prepares to dive into popcorn.

Drill Bit: Going to Nimbus Land? NOT WHILE I'M HERE!

Mewd: I thought we were led to beileive that the drill died? Smash Damacon: As I said, Bowser's scratches are so pathetic that he only needed a Band-Aid. Mewd: or some paint seeing as he's a robot.

Bowser shrugged and scratched Drill Bit. The creature ran away, calling, "SIR KING, I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY! IT'S ALL THE KOOPAS' FAULT!"

Smash Damacon: And Stephen King responded to this by writing another novel that made Bowser have a heart attack. Mewd6: Bowser ran away screaming this, as he had broken his nails off on the robot. Mewd6: robots technically aren't creatures,

Bowser: Hey, could Sir King be the Nimbus King?

Smash Damacon: Morton:....Nah immpossible!

Morton: Possibly! Let's go see! Wait... we can't go up this cliff without help! SERGEANT FLUTTER!

Smash Damacon: Why would Flutter respond to the guy he deserted? Mewd: Apparently since the town of monstos wasn't effected by "monster good makeing" that'd make flutter remain of his side. Smash Damacon: Whatever that means.

Sergeant Flutter: You rang? Oh, you want my troopas to carry you up? Once you both lose 20 pounds each and get better aditudes I'll let you up.

Smash Damacon: *Yelling at screen* Install an elevator!

Bowser: Will a nice Drill Claw attack change your mind?

Mewd: No thanks we already have one. Smash Damacon: Flutter: No, we can fly out of your reach in microseconds. Smash Damacon: Too bad they forgot about that in the next sentence.

Sergeant Flutter: Eeeep... ALL RIGHT, JUST DON'T SCRATCH ME!

Mewd: Flutter: Yeah, our ability to pull all our body parts into our hard shells would be of no use. Smash Damacon: Flutter must be really sensitive to pain if the threat of a little scratch will render him into a cowering blob of Jell-o.

Bowser: That's better! The Koopas rode up the cliff to Bean Valley. They ran into a Sledge Brother at the Beanstalk to Nimbus Land!

Smash Damacon: *Gulp* Smash Dives into his popcorn.

Sledge: SORRY, BUDDY!

Smash Damacon: So this guy is Bowser's buddy? Mewd: Seeing as they didn't request anything, and he hasn't done anything I don't see what he has to be sorry about. Smash Damacon: And why is the sledge talking?

Morton: You have a serious attitude problem! Maybe a scratch will change your attitude, will it not, you madman?

Smash Damacon: Sledge brother: Sorry pal, I have a package of 200000 bandages and a gallon of disinfectant.

Sledge: GET OUT OF HERE! YOU MAY NOT PASS! Bowser scratched the Sledge Brother.

Mewd: The varity of the battle tactics in this story never seizes to amaze me Smash Damacon: *Boredly* Scratch.....

Sledge: BOOMERANG BROTHERS, GET OUT HERE!

Smash Damacon: Boomerang Brother: Make me. Mewd6: Argh, I got nothing

About ten Boomerang Brothers came, along with 20 Hammer Brothers, five Fire Brothers and two Sledge Brothers.

Smash Damacon: Why the rest came along, we may never know. Mewd: they just kinda came out of no where, the sledge brothers devide like bacteria apparently.

Bowser and Morton equipped Drill Claws and scratched about 50 times.

Mewd: however this still failed to get rid of the compulsive itch they had in a unreachable portion of their backs. Smash Damacon: Not again...*Dives into his bucket again. THUMP!* Ow! Hey! Who ate all my popcorn? Mewd: *quickly while twisting head left to right* Grimlins...yeah... Smash Damacon: I'm leaving to get some more. Want anything? Mewd: food. lots of it. Smash Damacon: Other than paper to write a sucicide note, that is. Smash Damacon: Okay. -Reverse door seaqunce Smash walks out of the theater and goes to the snack bar, which somehow has fit into the escape pod. He refills his bucket of popcorn and goes over to a large tank of butter and other conniments in over sized novelty despensers that fill most of the room, and then proceeds to rip the entire refriderater out from the wall. Smash Damacon: Thank evilness that this host segment was short. -Door seaqunce Mewd is buried in bodies of dead creatures, popcorn, and sugar candy. Smash Damacon: There, food. Smash Damacon: Eat it now. Mewd: I ca-I can't breathe. Smash jams some scuba gear into the pile of food.

That didn't kill them all.

Smash: Really, genius. When did you figure this out? Mewd: Seeing as they just wave their claws infront of them not aimed at anything I would suspect that.

Bowser called a giant Mechakoopa to attack them. Morton did the same.

Smash Damacon: Finally! Something different! Mewd6: Don't get to enthralled by such a change, they'll go back to scratching themselves within seconds. Smash Damacon: Ew.... Smash Damacon: I wonder where

That was the end of all of them EXCEPT the three Sledge Brothers.

Smash Damacon: The end of all of them, including Bowser and the already-dead Morton.

Sledge: I TOLD YOU YOU COULD NOT PASS!

Smash Damacon: Sledge: AND I'M GOING TO YELL IN CAPITAL LETTERS UNTIL YOU GIVE UP! Mewd6: Do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars. Smash Damacon: Go to the Abyss. Mewd suddenly vanishes in a blast of fire Mewd suddenly reappears with all his fur burnt off Mewd: Free parking! Smash Hits Mewd with a stick his size, to him it would be an entire tree

Bowser just scratched them all again. That destroyed them.

Mewd: he kamikazed himself by scratching them and himself, this caused a necular explosian. Smash Damacon: This also resulted in the creation of Armageddon's Blade and the torture of random innocents.

They started climbing the vine...

Mewd: Seeing as their only a bean stalk they're apparently trying to sneak into someones ivy covered home.

***

Smash Damacon: Oh goodie, we finally change scenes. Maybe this will cause the end of the story. Mewd: hey look its all the innocent children of the world holding hands in a bond of freindship. Or its some burnt popcorn. Smash Damacon: I thought you were going to do the next line and I had to hurry to get my part in. Smash Damacon: There's only that many innocent children? Mewd: What? haven't you seen basic television nowa-days? Smash Damacon: I've been doing a good job. Smash Laughs evily. Smash Damacon: Who do you think thought it up?

Unknown guy who turned the enemies good: They've broken through the first line!

Mewd: My, isn't this scene descriptive, or even understandable. Smash Damacon: And how would he know that? Mewd: Apparently the "vines" have motion detecters

Land Six: Nimbus Land

Smash Damacon: Whohoo! We're almost done! Mewd6: Finally! Wait, the stories only slightly over half done... Ahh! Smash Damacon: Noooo! Smash screams and Attempts to blow up the film projector.

Bowser: FINALLY! Now it's time for the ULTIMATE Koopa Mayhem!

Mewd: *slumps in his chair with a glazed tired look in his eye as he rubs the black circles around his eyes and speaks tiredly and unexited* May-hem.... Yeah.... wooo... *raises hands in the air half heartedly and drops them* Smash Damacon: *Slumps backwards and looks almost dead* May...hem.... *Blood begins to come out of his mouth*

Bowser and Morton destroyed half of the troops guarding Nimbus Land from the outside, but were very tired.

Mewd: Seeing as there are only two gaurds I assume they missed their afternoon nap. Smash gets on his knees and begins to pray. Smash damacon: Please, please let this end. I'm sorry I ate all those tasty blue cat thingies.

Morton: 500... more... are... coming!

Mewd: Oh no! 500 more star bucks locations and pokemon plush toys are pileing up in nimbus land! Smash Damacon: Oh no! He's changed into William Shatner!

Bowser: I can take them! GET UP, MORTON!

Mewd: Morton: seeing as I am still standing and have taken the time to count all the approching enemies, I am driven to continue by the fact that you can handle the rest of them. Smash Damacon: Bowser: Take them... out to dinner! Mewd: bowser: shut up morton, just avoid falling alseep from our "exciteing" battle seaqunces.

THAT got Morton's attention.

Mewd: ....What did? Smash Damacon: Apparently those are secret magic words that can wake the dead.

They defeated approximately 499 of the troops, but one huge troopa still remained.

Smash Damacon: Approximately... Sounds more like an exact to me. Mewd: Bowser: wait let me recount, I think theres more then one infront of us. *he points his finger forward cross eyedly and begins to count*

Huge troopa: I AM LUIGI, THE GREAT AND POWERFUL!

Smash Damacon: And you came to this conclusion how? Mewd: Huge troopa: To show how manly and powerful I am I'll talk in all caps just like every other egotistical idiot who has acsess to a computer.

YOU ARE DEAD!

Mewd: Huge troopa: MENTALLY ATLEAST. Smash Damacon: Morton: You are right! Tell him what he's won Johnny!

I WILL NOT ALLOW YOU TO ESCAPE MY WRATH!

Smash Damacon: 'Luigi': YOU SHALL BE FORCED TO LISTEN TO MY BELLOWING FOR ALL ETERNITY!

Bowser: LUIGI! Are YOU the one causing all this wrath?

Mewd: bowser: Are you the one that manufacters it and ships it? Smash Damacon: Bowser: Are YOU the ONE doing the COMMERCIALS for IT?

Luigi: NO! I AM THE BOSS OF THE SECOND LINE OF DEFENSE!

Mewd: 'luigi': I APPLIED FOR FIRST DEFENCE BUT I WAS DECLINED FOR NOT HAVEING A GRADE SCHOOL EDUCATION! I FEEL SAD! AND WRATHFUL! I DON'T LIKE YOU! I AM VERY FOND OF POPCORN! Smash Damacon: Sure, take all my lines

Bowser and Morton scratched Luigi continuously. After a long battle they won.

Mewd: Ever notice how not a single one of these enemies have bothered to do anything besides stand around and let themselves be stracthed until they either die or run away? Smash Damacon: *From his new popcorn bucket* Yep, that's why I can't bear to watch. Smash Damacon: It's too stupid for my genius tastes. Mewd: Their so very mature, they also pinched and called him names, Cuaseing such a chaotic battle that the writer deicded not to descrive it any further then "long"

Luigi: SIR KING! THEY'RE THROUGH THE SECOND LINE!

Mewd: Bowser: Thanks cap obsessed enemy, I am sure glad you told me we've made it threw! I'd be at a loss without such information. Smash Damacon: Luigi: NO PROBLEM KID.

Luigi suddenly blew up. Nuts and bolts...?

Mewd: Great, now the authers questioning his own story. We're not alone, finnally! Smash Damacon: Capital letters sprayed out everywhere, making everyone in the world talk like the writer.

Bowser: This MUST be Mario. NOBODY else has caused me so much trouble!

Mewd: Bowser: Besides those darn dirty k-mart employees! *bowser grips his fists and grinds his teeth madly* Smash Damacon: Other than my goodie-two-shoes clone, of course.

The third line came next. It was much like the last two lines of defense.

Mewd: Makeing this exactly like the last two battles in terms of descriptian. Smash Damacon: *Sighs in relief that the scratch-fest has been skipped this time*

It didn't take Bowser and Morton too much to defeat them. After a while they came to a dinosaur.

Mewd: Dinosaur: You can stop standing in the middle of the area motionless, The battles over. Smash Damacon: I've got a bad feeling about this....

Yoshi: Yoshi hungry! Yoshi eat bad koopas!

Smash Damacon: They taste bad. I've tried them, and I felt like my mouth was full of sawdust for hours.

Bowser and Morton decided to scratch Yoshi ten times each. Yoshi survived.

Mewd: Huzzah! Yoshi survived desion makeing! Smash Damacon: I knew it! Smash Damacon: *Dives into his pop this time* Mewd6: geez, Those koopas most be genius' to of come up with something so new and orignal. Smash Damacon: *There is a gagging sound coming from the soda pool that is Smash's drink* Mewd puncters a hole in smash's soda causeing it to spill all over the escape pod, sparks begin to fly. Mewd: Oops. Smash Damacon: Quick! Get into the spare escape pod! they get into a smaller theater with only two seats and barly enough room to sit with yet another theater screen* Smash Damacon: Good thing I managed to save my popcorn.

Yoshi: Bad, bad koopas! Yoshi punish you!

Smash Damacon: He's going to bombard them with bad puns until they give up and die. Mewd6: I get the feeling that tactic was used for the entire story towards the readers. Smash Damacon: Except that there's no bad puns, only bad ideas.

Yoshi licked the Koopas. Yoshi drool went everywhere.

Mewd: Why do I get the feeling that this story was in fact made by pro noun challanged yoshi? Smash Damacon: You're just paranoid.

YUCK! DINO DROOL!

Smash Damacon: And what's so bad about that? It's cleaner than you, anyway.

Bowser and Morton repeated their attack. Yoshi ran away.

Mewd: seeing as their last attack was a desion makeing this was obviosly to much for yoshi to stand. Mewd: Listening to them discuss if its smart to scratch the enemy or not... on and on.... Smash Damacon: I can answer that question now. It is not smart to scratch your enemy. It's smart to slash your enemy, or cut your enemy, but not scratch.

That's what you get for messing with the SUPER BOWSER BROTHERS!

Mewd: *weakly* yeah... Smash Damacon: What? They did that stupid phrase again? Smash Damacon: I'm gonna die!

Morton: Only one line of defense left!

Mewd: I know this becuase I can't count higher then four! Smash Damacon: Morton: One...Two....seven....nine....

The Koopas run into a whole bunch of guards. Guards: Yoh, Eee, Ooh! Eee-OOH, oh! Yoh, Eee, Ooh! Eee-OOH, oh! Yoh,Eee, Ooh! Eee-OOH, oh!

Smash Damacon: *Keels over and dies from the mindless chant* Mewd6: Their attempting to summon the norse god of yoyos threw this tedios sayence.

Bowser: I remember! Remember how the mushrooms and cake from Marrymore told us that there are guards here that sing ‘Yoh, Eee, Ooh!’ all the time? Morton: Yeah. Bowser: They also told us they can't stand being scratched. Morton: Yeah! Bowser: Let's go get them!

Smash Damacon: Morton: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mewd: Bowser: Wait I'm not done recaping every stupid detail in a manner that we sound like moronic mindless turtles. Smash Damacon: But that's what they are. Mewd: oh, carry on.

Morton and Bowser scratched a whole bunch of them, but they didn't even flinch. They just kept singing ‘Yoh, Eee, Ooh! Eee-OOH, oh! Yoh, Eee,Ooh! Eee-OOH, oh! Yoh, Eee, Ooh! Eee-OOH, oh!’

Mewd: thank you for repeatiding the entire lyrics of their song four times before stopping. Smash Damacon: *Rembers that he's supposed to be dead* Mewd: Not very efficent guards are they, bowser and morton just walked up to them and scratched them continusly while they sang.

Bowser called the Koopalings through a CB.

Smash Damacon: CB-Crispy Beetles Mewd: Consistant babble? crunchy bacon? Control battles? Smash Damacon: All of the above.

Bowser: Hello, kids?

Mewd: the ones that changed sides and became "good" enemies. Smash Damacon: Whatever that means

Iggy: King Dad! Did you get the shadowy guy? Bowser: No, but I have a request of all of you.

Smash Damacon: Of course Iggy had heard of the shadow guy, he was reading the script. Mewd: I assume the guards are still chanting or just standing their with blank looks on their faces doing nothing. Smash Damacon: Just like some people I know.

Morton Jr.: Why a request, I hate requests because they usually have to do with helping people and I hate helping people and I'd rather talk about the ocean and cheese pizza and chocolate and Donkey Kong, Jr. and...

Smash Damacon: Don't listen! He's trying to hypnotise you! Mewd: apparently all of the koopa lings are talking into a peice of crispy bacon at once.

Ludwig: Don't talk about chocolate, you're making me hungry! Larry: SHUT UP! Yes, what do you want us to do, King Dad?

Smash Damacon: Bowser: Kill each other. Mewd: Bowser: Amuse me with hilarios puppet antics. Mewd: Bowser: Explain this story to me in a way that makes sense.

Bowser: I want you to go get the citizens of Marrymore for me. Ask one of my troopas to guide you there.

Smash Damacon: Even though there are none left. Mewd: Bowser: Get one of the troopa's that're on the opposeing side, enemies make good guides.

Wendy: NOOOOOOOO! NOOOOOOOO! (repeat about 10 times!)

Smash Damacon: Hm..... Smash Damacon: Apparently Wendy's imitating a fire engine. Mewd: Well the auther wants us to contribuate to this story by repeating the stupid phrase ourselves ten times. Mewd: Frankly I'm against it, But I fear for someone who dose do this.

Roy: SHUT UP, WENDY! Morton Jr.: Yeah, shut up, 'cause I'm supposed to do all the talking, but for some reason that annoys everybody, but I like talking, because it doesn't take too much energy and it doesn't take up time and...

Lemmy: SHUT UP! We'd be happy to destroy the citizens of Marrymore, KingDad!

Mewd: Bowser: Actully I said to go get them, but killings nice too. Smash Damacon: Apparently Bowser's kids have an obsession with doors and ascention.

Bowser: Good. Go on! The Koopas ponder what to do next. They decide to body slam the guards.THAT gets them!

Mewd: Guards: ARGH, Desion makeing! The pain! Smash Damacon: But no one ever told me what THAT is!

There is one more thing in their way...

Mewd: A gapping plot hole

Huge robot: I AM MARIO, THE GREAT AND POWERFUL! NO KOOPAS MAY PASS!

Smash Damacon: Mayo? Where? Mewd: *slaps forhead* Smash Damacon: What? Mewd: bad pun, they never even said mayo or anything close to it Smash Damacon: So? Would you rather I chomp you? Mewd: it would be less painful. Smash Damacon: Okay Smash Bites Mewd and Mewd ends up with four holes through his body. Mewd: only four? you must have bad dental care. Smash Damacon: No, only my canines made it all the way through Smash Damacon: The rest were too short, they only left puncture wounds.

Bowser and Morton just scratch it repeatedly.

Mewd: And becuase they messed up the paint job the pilot of the giant robot was in such anger that he commited suicide. Smash Damacon: What pilot? Smash Damacon: It's just a clay dummy that stands there with a tape recorder in its mouth. Mewd: Well we could claim simmiler to the rest of the cast of this story. Smash Damacon: Now let's get on with it before I accidenlty blow up the theatre.

Mario robot: I TOLD YOU I AM GREAT AND POWERFUL! NOTHING CAN DESTROY ME! FEEL MY WRATH!

Mewd: its wet and sloppy with a mud like consistancy Smash Damacon: Unlike my wrath, which tastes like fine wine, but turns to fire in the stomach.

Mario jumps on the Koopas. Bowser and Morton breaths lots of fire at the robot. That kills it.

Smash Damacon: You can't kill something that isn't alive in the first place. Mewd: Robot: Nooo, I never got to see the final episode of survivors season two! *bursts into tears as his scream his heard threwout the castle* Mewd: He was done a favor really.

Mario robot: NOTHING CAN DESTROY ME! NOTHING CAN DE...STR...O...Y... MEEEEEEE...

Smash Damacon: Yes, thank you for informing us of that. Now be a good robot and explode. Mewd: Greaaaaat, now the robots talking like most people do after watching a entire episode of WWf.

Bowser and Morton go into the king’s room!

Smash Damacon: They know this because of the big neon signs around it.

Unknown, shadowy figure: Did you like how I turned all your enemies good? Well, even if you didn't, I did!

Mewd: Bowser: Yes I rather enjoyed it, I came all this way to tell you that. Smash Damacon: Shadowy figure: Aw, man, I was hoping to have to poke you with a stick for not enjoying it

Bowser finally realizes the shadow is somebody he recognizes. Bowser: ... MALLOW! Why did you turn my troopas evil?

Mewd: And why were you a human eariler in the story? Smash Damacon: Ouy, again with the evil/good thing. Smash Damacon: That's why I like a world where mages wear robes, Smash Damacon: with the colors showing their alignment. Mewd: Bowser: Why did you change my troops to good then evil, and back and farth everytime I try to refer them as whatever.

Mallow: Because I wanted to annoy you! You should know that already! Morton: WHY DID YOU WANT TO ANNOY US?

Mewd: So... let me get this straight.... Mallow turns all of bowsers allies into enemies every friday the thirteenth to irritate him? Smash Damacon: The logic is just stunning. Mewd: And bowser never did anything the previos times? And mallows last name is king?

Mallow: Ah, a friend of yours?

Smash Damacon: Bowser: Actually, a victim. Mewd: Well that explains everything now dosen't it?

Bowser: Actually, he is my father! Morton: Hello, Mallow! I have heard bad things about you! You are evil and out for world conquest, are you? You are a bad, bad boy!

Mewd: hypocrite Smash Damacon: Bowser: Therefore, we have no choice but to make like my arch enemy and kill you.

Mallow: That's what YOU TWO are!

Mewd: Fathers! isn't that horrible!? Smash Damacon: I've got a baaaaaaaad feeling about this.

The fight began. Bowser and Morton scratched Mallow about 50 times each. Mallow shrugged and zapped the koopas with Thunderbolt. The Koopas bodyslammed Mallow about 100 times each. Mallow just covered them with a giant snowman. Bowser and Morton breathed fire at Mallow about TWO HUNDRED times each!

Mewd: Then he hit them a thousand times, and they hit him a million times, then a billion, then a trillion, then a bajillion crillion. Etc. Smash Damacon: And yet, it only took five sentences to describe it all. Smash Damacon: And amazingly, they didn't collapse from exhaustion afterwards.

Mallow simply called a huge star to fall on the Koopas. Bowser tossed a Super Mushroom to Morton who ate it happily. Bowser took one for himself. The Koopas called a giant Mechakoopa to crush Mallow, who used Shocker on the Koopas. Bowser and Morton brought a mountain up on Mallow. Mallow was too weak to do anything so the Koopas used a scratch attack again. FINALLY, THE MARSHMALLOW WAS DESTROYED!

Smash stands up from his chair and quickly Leaps to his hindclaws, head almost hitting the top of the pod, raising his foreclaws high into the air and howling at the celing.* And no one cared!

Epilogue:

Mewd: We're almost to the finish line! all we have to do is cross these smoldering hot coals and swim threw the lake of fire! Smash Damacon: YES! There is a god!

Bowser and Morton returned home via the bridge (it was fixed after Mallow was destroyed).

Mewd: It magically reasembled itself just becuase mallow was killed. Smash Damacon: The logic is still stunning.

They returned to see a land of no humans! Stunned, Bowser called his kids via CB.

Mewd: GASP, There are still no humans in a world populated by reptiles and mushroom people. the horror. Smash Damacon: He was holding a piece of crunchy bratwurst to his ear.

Bowser: Are you there, kids? Larry: Right here! Almost to Marrymore!

Mewd: We're standing right next to you so we're almost there! Smash Damacon: Larry had been snarfing the hallucigenoic mushrooms again and thought Bowser was right nex to him.

Bowser: Have you seen my workers? Morton Jr.: Actually, we brought all of your workers with us to Marrymore because we thought that we alone couldn't destroy the citizens of Marrymore alone and the unknown shadowy guy stole all our wands and items and we couldn't attack alone and the idiots who we tried were far bigger and superior to us and...

Smash Damacon: And were never mentioned before. Mewd: All of those two foot mushroom people with no weapons or fighting skills were to much for them,

Ludwig: Actually, it was my superior genius who decided to bring the guards! Bowser: SEND THEM BACK AND GO GET THE CITIZENS!

Smash Damacon: Bowser: I WANT INNOCENTS TO TORTURE!

Morton: Why? Bowser (after turning the C.B. off): I'm lonely here! WAAAAAH!

Mewd: Morton: don't worry daddies here! Mewd: Bowser: I'm all alone! Boohoo! Smash Damacon: That was the only semi-intellegent line in the entire story.

The End

Mewd: Thank all of the gods in all religions! Smash Damacon: Thank Takhisis Nutari, and all other minor and major gods! It's over! Mewd: ITS FINNALLY OVER Smash Damacon: Mewd? What's the moral of the story? Mewd: Moral: never scratch yourself or you'll kill all those around you. Smash Damacon: Now I shall give my review. Smash Damacon: This story was one of the most utterly mindless things I've ever seen. It's so terrible we may have to MST the MST. Smash Damacon: Watch out! We're entering the atmosphere! Mewd and Smash Damacon: AIEEEEEEEEE! Suddenly the gigantic troopa satelite swoops down from above and pulls the escape pod in in the nick of time. -reverse door seaqunce. Smash Damacon: Whos smart allec idea was it to make escape pods that could barely take the pressure and heat of a planets atmusphere? Mewd shrugs Mewd: I don't know, though I am sure glad my playing with the controll pannel didn't turn off the tracter beam. they both laugh stupidly. Smash Damacon: I'm going to kill you for useing such a stupid excuse for story continium. Mewd: ha ha ha.... ha.... Smash Damacon: I'm serrios FIN Mewd: Huzzah back